starrystarrytwenty

beautiful disaster

this is starrystarrytwenty

"No, there is no escape.
There is no heaven with a little hell in it -
no plan to retain this or that of the devil in our hearts or our pockets
Out Satan must go, every hair and feather."
- GEORGE MACDONALD

"I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen:
not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else."
- C.S. LEWIS

Thursday, February 01, 2007

"warning" pms-ing

the post where i felt indifferent.. that wasnt pms.. im sure of it.. coz my pms was in full blast yesterday and a bit of it today.. itz funny how u know and can feel ur mood swings but can scarce control it.. bleah..

little little tiny things piss me off and i get sUper annoyed by things that on usual days i brush aside.. i start crying too.. bleAh.. i think thatz the worst part.. i did it again today while talking to ling.. thot abt all the negative things that were happening, mummy and peiyi not ard, im doing most of the house chores, i lost my specs, i hate wearing contacts, i miss erjie, im starting to think that the long hours with sw are taking a turn for the worse, damienz an ass etcetcetc.. thatz not the only thing.. i can juz start tearing over nth, like juz suddenly weep.. weird.. dun understand it myself.. and moments before i was pretty happy playing a bit of tennis.. the mood swings are really high and low..

u know these never use to happen.. ask anyone and they'll tell u that xinyi never, or rarely, pms-es.. 6 years w ling and thatz wat she'll tell u, ask mummy and she'll tell u i dont pms.. only in the recent months that these things start to happen.. mood swings, pms.. itz terrible.. i really hate it, itz not me at all.. i actually raised my voice and kicked someone in anger.. that never happens!!! i feel sO guilty!! im sorry to all who i did that to.. i know pms is sO not an excuse.. i'll learn to try and keep it under control.. i prOmise!!

on the bright side of things.. mummy and peiyi are back on sat.. yAy!! erjie got her much awaited and much deserved (aft all that hard work)honours.. so much for being academically challenged when she was younger.. thatz where hard work will bring u.. (:
sg won thailand in a controversial match.. which i watched w my sw classmates at the national stadium, the last ever b4 itz torn down.. the thais didnt play thAt well.. sg did seem like they wanted to win more than the visitors.. hopefully they can hold out in the second leg..
hmmm.. wat else is good.. oh yar.. im getting a new pair of spectacles.. haha.. aft almost 6years of wearing the same one.. hmm.. ive got new clothes and shoes for cny.. yAy!! oo yes.. justin helped me get ben tanz number.. haha.. so i can contact him first to see if hez open to the idea of me doing attachment at his centre b4 i email him the details.. (:

thatz quite it.. i think.. hmm.. better hit the sheets.. not sure if lack of slepp contributes to my flaring moods.. it in itself is kinda irritating.. this other side of me isnt one i appreciate..